argh.there goes the left ankle...shit..should wear tighter shoes..i am super injury prone...fag man.sian si.....i am praying for the day tt i can be fully fit...lets see the injury list stand at both ankles, left toe, blisters, left wrist....okok....but i cant afford not to go training or run or play....cos they r just to fun to stop....never mind.....

floorball today totally rox.....after reinforcements arrived...shit shouldnt hav lost to cps lor...they not so shen....damnit...lck.....so r so WRONG lor...damn...shit fag gay lar...gonna win against eng...tt it....everyone was pro today....yeah! n i scored a total flunk shit fag gay goal....even n ant can stop it....haha....watever...

fencing....alamak......chia...shit...no...today quite cock.....ok going to make a list of wat i hav to improve....set a goal...liao...i might be giving myself too much pressure...just training onli ma....relax.no no excuses...lucky i did ok towards the end....make the list later....

suddenly not tired liao.shall shower n do some work....i pon pe tomolo..sandals time haha..broadband is coming oh yeah...shit n the game no sound damn...

2 more days to aug...

i really dunno wat to do...if i do tt i will be a damn bastard...but i feel lyk doing tt shit lar..i am such a fucker...damn it....forget it..i tink tt is the best option suddenly hot suddenly cold.....is tt true? hiaz.

is promos tt near??? when is it? i dunno leh.y is everyone so lyk on abt promos...abt 1 month has passed since ct.....onli....can relax...i shall tink abt it in aug.not now...

was trying to figure out the vectors shit tt i copied during lect.....gave up n start doing the tutorial....i tink doing is much better than staring at the fag examples....fag lect....boring....did some qn....tt enough for today i hope.....shall go look at some chem.....mustnt be too slack....cant afford to die.....n there is physics too....ahh.....but lect is quite fun cos always can talk shit....i wonder how listens in lect attentively.....tt will be fagging disgusting....fag u~! haha

my toe hurts...after so long..maybe broken liao i tink..cant be bother lah.sian diao...wat is there to look forward tomolo..hmm..3 hrs of bio...i feel lyk faint sia..

hiaz sch is veri unfair u noe....u noe a not..just look at that n that n that n that..screw off leh...y must u judge pple by ur criteria...y cant u judge pple for wat they r doing wat they do best.....i dun make sense i tink...but tt wat i tink..maybe i am senseless..i hate following.....fag.....

slack slack slack....hiazz.damn sian....slp super early yester....i dunno y...recently just veri tired...anyway....tomolo got ifg floorball n the learning journey...shit lar..lck lyk quite pissed....how....hiaz..but i wanna play floorball.....argh......sian si.....i get the same feeling when someone pass away and when i am thinking abt playing soccer....i am sick....just realised tt.....

hiaz...so sian.i dun feel lyk even moving.....but i hav to go do some work sian si......shouldnt shower yet...force myself to do work.....oh n i wanted to get it for u.....but i didnt.....how....i tink i will know in due course....haha....another wrong decision......oh well....

8/9/03.....hehehe..how exiciting...hoping for a nice match...n if we win..tt will be even nicer...hahaha.....

the pple around mi r going bonkers recently....obsessed wif watever....lucky tomolo no gp.....a lot of work lar.....k bye.....

wah kao how slack today.....my wrist hurts lyk a fag.....should i do some work..si bei slack.kinda feeling gulity....ifg n learning journey how.....shit man.......the who ask mi not to go.....jas also......shit but den if dun go lck will be piss....n fag lar....sian......i must mug later...mug damn alot...damn fag

gd luck to ray n gin way too...hahaha..my badminton sux lyk a crap now...haha

lets see.....i am hurting everywhere esp the wrist n there is rashes at the ankle...maybe due to the ankle guard....

pw sux a lot.....waste time n energy n money....

going out again....i tink i really am slack.....lol

reading all the stuff makes mi feel weird.....dunno how to desribe.....hiaz....

n i got hit on the head twcie today...omg....how pathetic....argh....wasting my time here.....n i heard tt song liao......

in english it is " at least i left earlier than you"....

todays training was quite fun...got to hav a mock team comp..haha..but i tink i onli fenced average..lost to nick 5-4 n glad 5-3.the rest either i won or at least close up the gap i tink...nick n wei li are quite pro....fenced 8 bouts...must make clearer actions n vary my attacks n defense.....but i love to keep dist...veri fun

tomolo got nat trials...maybe go c a little bit....n nxt week is pesta sukan...team heheeh....hoope for a gd placing!......yq julian nick n me...no exucses this time chiong!!!!

irritating pw.....still hav to review 5 more articles in 2 days.....n hav chem qn n phyiscs qn n gp hw shit man......life sux....sch sux....!

wat the hell happened to blogger....hiazz.....

history is so easily forgotten tt it makes mi so sick...just the way pw makes mi puke...fuck the world....

someone left the sch today...not gonna come back....i dunno tt someone...but sometimes you got to take life easier? things aint never gonna go ur way all the time..cos if tt is the case...tt aint life......but den again.....it depends on how much u can take rite....lyk yfc....gdbye....

felt a little sad today...i dunno y...almost shed a tear...many others did...i didnt...had a talk with the ct...it is saddening....the sch was dead in the afternoon.just so dead....could feel it....it spread throughout you noe...just silence...n a few hours later...it was back to normal..go figure...but this is quite a shock....wonder how it was to feel all alone in the last few moments...it was nite...i was told....n i tink it must hav been a sad lonely nite...tt sucks out all the life of it....

i am quite sad.....i dunno y....maybe cos the more i tink of it....the more i want to noe wat it is lyk..but i not trying...i still hav many things waiting for mi to be done.....no time to do it.....

.....it became a competition to see who was the saddest..disgusting bastards....and i think there must have been a few of them bastards around.....

decided to quit yfc...partly cos of a screw up. but i hav decided to go past the pt of no return...po fu chen zhou...no choice...tt the onli way to relase myself frm hell n devote my time to mugging fencing cocking....tried desperately to call but no one answered..i hav just called...quit liao...tt the end of an unsccessful foray into flying....but i dun tink it is the lack of abilites..just tt at certain times....certain things r more important....studying n fencing for example.....anyway...the experience i will take with my forever n hope for the better in national serivce....the air force....would be nice....but i accept tt i any regrets i hav later on i will blame me n only me cos i am the one who decided on this course of action on the 25th of july 2003 at 5.03pm....i chose the easy way out....i am ashamed of myself......but i will make it up....i must....

hav to review 4 articles today....do the chem question...joined the physics o for fun....maybe chem n bio too....but i under no pressure..dunno if it is too late tho...n the phyiscs question.n gp hw...n much more shall take it one at the time...reached home early today..jim said damn.....haha

got home at 5? havent touch anything except the storybook...argh...fag....shall finish it on the train tomolo....fag....ipw..i hate it

shall do work n listen to the radio at the same time....home alone tonite so i can concentrate must settle pw first...fag...getting a wretch headache....n stressed by yfc..i am gonna burn the place down.....must call to tell dem i am not coming on sat..i rather fencing on an injured ankle....lol......

i hope i hear tt song again.....work work...no slp....ifg floorball is when ah? i dunno leh...ARGH! but nvm cos i am playing hehehe......off to work.....GOGOGO......ipw.....suck......

n recently.....despite my tardy appearence...tt according to some.....i tink i look quite decent..but nvm tt.....the maths teacher say i am a gd student.....lol.....havent heard tt since the primary sch days......haha

u really really really like her.....but den rite...maybe she really really really dun given a fuck abt u....y waste time???????....go play more soccer lar......gd for health.....lol.......

sian si....gp teacher never come today lol....but sian day..ankle hurts pain

ray kop my chem stuff...tt fag....arghhhh....idiot......ken injured..hopes he come to sch tomolo..veri sian....
i finally got home earlier than usual today....no more 10pm days....but i am still tired lyk shit....didnt pay attention in lect...hiaz...ohohoh xenosaga episode 2...coming out....still havent complete xenosaga 1.....shit man....neglecting my ps2......n my bro bought stupid games.....total idiot to waste money....disgusting.....

borrowed a book....catch mi if u can!!! hehe....happy looks damn interesting...haha..shall read n eat.....ok den i hav to do work liao

chem.....equilibrium read up...
physics....gravitation....
bio....arrr.....dunno.....read watever lar
gp.......do the hw
pw......sian si.....must fill up all the forms.....intensive/irritating paper work

actually quite slack lor...nothing to do......jc is how slack unlike sec sch.....haha......on n fag yfc......suck my allele hahaaha corny.....but really fag yfc..to hell wif u.....

hope i can go fencing on sat...pain....

heard a nice meaningful song on the radio today morning...shit.....forgot who sang it liao..damn......

ifg soccer......shiok...well done team..but i tink i should shut up.....

injuries list......right ankle, left knee, right shoulder, left toe, left index finger nail...pain.....as a result fencing was terrible today hiaz...sucked like a piece of fag....disgusting...but try n get myselg out of harms way..hiazz...shit.....i damn injury prone...

ufc is stressing mi out too....tink i am the slowest liao...hiaz if only fencing standard would be more consistent....gd tt is..lar den i can fag yfc liao...HIAZZ.......damn tired....never do work recently.....shit....n gp hw kenna rejected......shit man...

sian slp....must go shower first....tomolo must start to mug a bit...fag fag fag..must win soccer finals....hahahaa

fencing was fun today...until...hmm.pple there would noe...lol...
den saw the orgy cheer pple doing fag cheers....esp cj was super red.....haha damn fag funny...woah quite dangerous leh..everyone falling everywhere lyk no one bussiness....wah siao....n talk more cock wif cock pple.....den went for dinner n eat all my money away....shit....i hate myself....fag...chemistry hw staring mi in the face.....havent do yet....fag lar...today during maths lect was super ultra tired....cos yester i had dinner wif ziming.....SUPER SHIONG.....when to ps to this ICHIBAN SUSHI....there goes more money......but found out tt i am deprived of gd food.....but it was damn nice eating n talking....ahhh..got home damn late yester....n now also screwed...havent bathe yet......dick......

tomolo soccer...got chance..hehe...hope no screw ups.....got a gash on the right arm.....argh.pain sia.....tomolo long day sia...shit...fencing n ifg....got a lot of backdated hw.....cant slp tonite...must go look at my diary......shit fag...

better go do work.......I NEED TO SLP....SHIT.....

argh weird day wif weird stuff happening...mother weird...

f yfc fag

argh.disaster...fence lyk a totally fag execept for 2nd bout during finals.....argh....disgusted n pissed wif myself..julian nick n esp yq fence well so they help mi steal back a silver....took a panadol....no excuse....the seniors esp derrick give mi some tips.....shall try n put tt into practise.....back to training.....i still sux big time...i take the lead n lose it....shit....concentration quite poor...n arm dun seem to move at any spd today...slow n never stretch out....remember...back to more training...disgusting.....yuck....

dun look so glum.....smile.....i must improve...k.....bernard tan thrashed mi again...i will get him soon...fag...i swear....

studies on hold this weekend....i tink i dun go national trials this sat...study....shall train more instead....but if other pple go i go lar....hiazz...damn sian....sch tomolo....racial harmony day.....who fuck cares? more interested in training..dun feel lyk going pe...too tired...fag....

treated some fencing pple to dinner...my 50 become 30....i dun mind treating them...they r quite nice pple....shall try surviving on 20 for 5 days....impossible....unless i starve

just taken some flu medicine again....plus loads of chinese traditional medicine...feeling drowsy....must be the drugs.....hope i can pull it off tomolo...wat unlucky timing......

when the going gets tough, the tough gets going.....frm mr lee

wanted to sep this post...my team is in bad shape....3 injured 1 sick....tt means everyone is unfit....n comp is tomolo..under pressure to show pple wat happened on last sun was no fluke....i must hav confidence in myself..the chance is wat i make out of it...i will give u a good show...hav set some goals alreadi..hope to achieve them tomolo n go for dinner wif zm happily...just do it guys....yq nick julian n me......lets just do the job n do it well n live to remember tomolo....come on guys.....push all the way...believe in yourself n believe in your teammates.....tt all.....

work maths chem phys bio n rest

today is totally terrible....i wasted so much time...n was so unlucky disaster....

lets see....went to training at 8 30.....coach came at 9 30....end training at 11 00....i was damn bloody tired thru out the trng cos of the flu....lyk no energy left...dunno how to explain..just tt my arms wouldnt move...robotic at a pt of time...tt disgusting..n kenna thrashed by everyone...i am not gonna make any excuses for myself...i just sucked today...tried to regain some confidence by sparring..died miserably.....damn...

after trng..went to eat KFC.....shit....wasted 5.30 bucks.....den went back to clementi to stone for a awhile cos i didnt wanna go home alone.....n went to rj wif julian via 165...to put stuff in locker....n den stone there for 1 hour!!!! n then waited for yl to finish his lunch...tt was lyk alreadi 2.....den found out left pe shirt at clementi.....cheong all the way back.....reached there at 3....found pe.....watch epee.....super sian n slow....den left at 4.....just got home....cos had to make a detour due to a fire at whites sands which was put out wif 4 fire engines....2 of the fire jeeps n a truck.....n 3 police cars plus 100 on lookers....

so i got home at 6 when i could hav gotten home at 1......wasted 5 hours......

pw gone....finish my survey.hiazz..mask glove everything spoil need to buy need ones....NO DUN HAV MONEY...shit....
i wanted to do some work today n rest well shit.....promos r coming lar....i must start to cherish my time .....damn

n i meeting am for dinner tomolo.shit...cant stand him up again...how...die msut go..tt means sun is gone....ok the plan is to cheong home every non fencing day...n cheong home after every training..tt the onli way to save time....n must really limit outings n expenditure....shit....k bye

my parents bought mi a new bag n shoes....ho bother.....without sounding too ungrateful....i wonder y this lyk to waste so much money....hiazz.....i prefer they save it up...i am fine wif my old bag n my old shoes...in fact i lyk my old bag n my old shoes....cos they hav been wif mi for a certain amt of time already.....nvm wat it has holes everywhere......i mean.......i dun really care do i? no...haha.....

just taken some flu medicine....i will probably be dead meat at tomolo's training....but i still hav to be there..so die die lar....i really hope the flu clears up by tomolo..pls....begging u....i am fag tired....expecting to collapse any moment soon....i tink i got the cold at nite yester/morning today.....was so fagging tired yester tt i slept at 7 30 woke up at 1am tinking it was 6 am waited to no avail in darkness for the alarm to ring....found out it was 1 am....went online n cock abt the house fall asleep at 4am woke up at 6 am.....haha......i am screwed....oh as i was typing dis the blocked nose is unblocked.....must be the medicine.....ribena n vit c help a little too i guess......

been wondering wat i look forward to each day....n the ans is probably nothing....just passing each day as each day passes...nothing special is happening at the moment.sun is comp....n i am exicited, nervous n pressured...but there isnt anyone to share the feelings wif cos no one can understand...den there is survey which the results is quite not my way.....they r saying my project isnt feasible.....damn it...screw u all haha...personally i tink it is gd.....yin quan one abt the chan family is damn interesting!.....ho n jia hui is super pro n microsoft words.....wow....never much a programmer....was more a hardware person....but den i tink i should really go brush up my skills...going to tokyo aint i alrighty.....just bring it to fencing tomolo to complete it...hiazz....n there is sch work, which is wasting lotsa of precious time....n so tough somemore...not tt it matters but it just adds to the irritation..n yfc which is a pain in the ass due to their overbearing high n mighty attitude...

hopefully on sunday can meet with ziming for dinner...stood him up twice...without sounding too gay..hope i can strike antoher medal in the team event so tt i can go eat happily....personally i feel tt i would onli be happy wif a medal...but den it might sound too ego...i wonder wat is the line separating confidence n egoism...lyk wat lck said in ipw today..maybe confidence is just a feminism for ego...lol......

physics got exactly 70% for A the great escape.....quite disgusting....yuck......must try improve the stupid score....so fagging lousy n tyco. damn it..quite pissed...

everyone is so competitive these days...argh..in fencing n studies n everything.....the ifg is quite faggorty...sign up for stuff still hav to go training one...wat the nonsense.....i thought it was just to play for fun..relax lar........anyway..i tink i onli play soccer enough liao....some pple just the ifg to get cca pts.....i tink tt is disgusting.....but den wat to do rite....tt the way the system works....yuck....

n the faggorty plastron is so fagging small....damn it lar...i hav to get it change....shit.....might piss felix off....damn it....but so x 105 bucks leh...shit.but i tink everyone the same lar....watever...

ipw is going ok....but the survey meet wif some probs....should hav done a trial run.....the results n qns might die....but nvm...can fake i guess..it is disgusting.but no choice.....haha.....overlook the errors shit...n alreadi print liao...nvm lar....just do it....forward all the way......

n i am down wif a stupid flu for all times now...shit shit shit damn it...wat fag rotten luck..pissed

my thighs are aching lyk shit....fag man....

today i found myself a burden to people.....hiaz.....i think they dun think i am a burden but the prob is a feel kinda gulity..you noe....lyk u trouble pple too much....hiazz...how should i put it...just tt i hope come nxt wk..i can do the job n not cause any more troubles....this i s a shit feeling...hiazz...wat the fag.....n today during chem lect i fall aslp...too tired...it was bloody crappy...i am so shag dis days......but i tink it is gd for health...so i hav no complaints......i must pick up form....n i think i must pick up confidence too...very low on morale now....so lyk i tink it affects my performance too...hiaz...shit man....i am mentally too weak.....

current injuries....toe n thighs
shall do maths tutorial 11 n read the last part of kinetics...tomolo is friday......no yfc nothing....great.....

just had a haircut too..another 10 dollars wasted..hiaz...but i tink it is too long liao...n parents hav been kaobeing abt the messy n tardy look of it.....but glad tt it has been done....sian....i tink i shall go do work n rest early.......ipw is gonna die....shit....

the toe is rally goner.....very swollen.pain...crap shit...training was ok...not so tiring...but i am still half dead.....havent seen my mother for 2 days liao cos of me leaving home at 6 30am n coming back at 10 pm....hiazz...shall try do some work.....i dun lyk trigo tho...n i tink i should start doing my pp too....after napfa i stop liao.....lyk damn cock...dun wanna deteriorate...20 my eoy....must work on parries n spd....n nothing else.....

ohh..saw donald during training......he how shiong....hiazz...i wish i hav a little more time to myself..but den..the time outside sch is taken up by fencing n yfc n mugging...hiaz...i really dun hav time for anything else..or else results might die....or something terrible might happen.....hiazz...watever....raining now

shower.....do tutorial 11....disgustingly hard.......n slp.....i tink i hav to skip pe....the toe is really disgusting!

toe veri pain....feet also pain argh

training today was gd....the team was damn pro.....must try n be lyk them.....anyway...they r ok pple...i tink should be quite nice......tomolo got training also.....aiya....yfc how? dunno liao

training was corny at times.cos coach mistook mi for derrick buaying b4 training....n a sec 2 diao derrick....lol...damn funny

hope tt sunday comp can do well....shall go shower n rest n pack n do work....k tt it.....full moon today n yester....ahh...3hr bio tomolo...i faint liao leh.....praying pw proposal pass....pls

just finish instant noodles....suddenly got pro....hey...if u dunno wat to say rite....dun say anything lar...so simple..n if u think it will be funny rite.....then avoid lar...alamak.....option c is always gd for health...but den, it depends on how emotional u can get.....lol......ah. sian man..tomolo got sch.sux.sux.sux. go to hell...n i screwed up a little today...fag sia.....

a few days ago...i had this weird dream..still can remember bits of it quite clearly.....i was walking thru a door with someone behind....a glass door i tink....den to my left 11 o'clock there was someone waving at mi....i was quite sure tt the person was waving at mi.....but den i told the person behind mi tt i was transparent n the person was waving at him/her....cant remember who was behind mi....wow...wat a weird dream....

n todays lt was friggin hot.....n WAT IS WRONG WIF TAMADE.......lyk tt isnt the most vuglar word i use...lyk tamade.....relax lar....life isnt abt being so polite n nice n watever.....if i have to watch every single word i say i might as well jump n die....rite or wrong...lol...

tomolo got training...i hope dun hav yfc on wed..just kick mi....i will kaobei...but at least it saves mi the need for decision making....but den i will onli hav fencing left n there wouldnt be turning back....no way...i hate making decisions cos i always screw up....so yeah i am indecisive...pathetic....

still remember wat u said on the train tt nite.....made a step towards tt already....things will onli get better...i hope......

n call u not call mi i go and extra for wat rite...hiaz...thin face..n loseristic.....fag

i wonder how felix know i was in rugby.....hmmm....he was a prop..lol......i sucked.....haha nvm
shit today actually wanted to go to swim finals wif ray n co. but cannot fag lar...shit....pe was damn fun today! so shaung....oh n there are iner faculty games...but den....aiya....ray is pro lar....i suck how to go.....argh...hehe........anyway still on fac..they hav porno stuff.....just got a porno badge.....yikeees!.....

n alvin tan congrat mi today too..amazing....how news spreads...but he was always a nice guy soo..hmm...maybe i should learn to be more contented...rite or wrong?

argh.....i wanna go swim finals.....actually i prefer going track finals...but my chances of going seem veri silm cos of fencing at nite.....maybe i should skip the gp tomolo.....should go support afang n lwx.....watever......tomolo long day sian si....

i cant understand y u r so ununderstandable.....is tt a word.....? things hav be damn smooth sailing for mi recently i hope it never changes.....but i fear it might change for the worse soon.....AAAB....one more pls......n my mouth sooner or later will get mi into a lot of trouble....hiaz..n did u know tt life is damn unfair...the fools these days.....

ok...i tink i pretty much kelong n fluke my way thru today....but it was great...although i still have doubts abt my real standard...the draw was damn lucky for mi...as in i fence wif pple i am comfortable wif....not BENARD TAN U CHEE BY......I AM GONNA GET U......my mental strength n concentration is pathetically weak....cos once i trail i am a goner n sometimes esp wif jay n benard tan.....the latter being a totally fag...the former being quite nice.....i just go into trance...not aware of anything......shit.....disgusting.....ok but going for more trainings wif pro kids n pro coach...so i tink i can only get better.....n i better train hard for the team event dis sunday.....i dun wanna screw up.....hopefully another medal......but got girls team....damn strong...but beat them man.....erp.....haha

n happiness is really difficult to share....i wonder how is it done.....not with sad or unconcerned people at least.....i tink...hiazz....i dun even feel like talking about it......

still got 20 gp essay outlines....i tink i do 10 can liao...n i hav to consider abt yfc n fencing serously....after the u17...

just read my horoscope....bad stuff..damn ominous...lyk if u lack experience stay out of the running n lyk if oyu r in a lazy phase you better watch out....fag u man.....fag u....

amazing how everyone is so very sad abt the death of the twins.....i mean..who cares.....there r millions of pple bloody hell dying every single day.n just beacause theirs is a much publicized case everyone is ho so sad so sad....dun pretend lar dicks....

n dun tell mi abt the kindness n all tt shit....cip is abt hours n more hours....so fuck off....liars...i dun wan pple to pity mi n neither would i wanna pity people.....the whole thing just stinks....

n i must get my ass to japan one day......

yfc is ok.....phew....a 5....thank god...but i dun wanna fly wif him....pls change..thanks....yfc shall be cast aside while i attend to more impt stuff...a little happier than b4

some people hav it all u c.....u cant really blame their pro-ness...they r just pro..n it just makes u envy n wanna be lyk them...but of course u cant....so while doing all the envy.....i suggest u go find somehing else that u r pro in as well so tt u dun need to be the one doing all the envy all the time.....it is nice if roles swap around sometimes...get it???

anyway....gp n chem n physics awaits......but i can trade all of that for a nice gd performance tomolo......

fencing training was quite fun....but my parries seriously sux i tink....yeah.must imrpove tt....disgusting...quite kelong at times too...funny..haha.....den now must mug yfc...den fly....everything will be over by 6pm today hopefully..den can get home n rest...ask abt the other people at comp today....squeeze in some work n prepare for tomolo...ok..getting an adrenaline overdose here lyk sec3 sailing comp...how exciting...haha....but first yfc.....

den the work i hav to complete....gp file + 20 essay outlines.....chem kinetics..damn difficult.....n physics gravitation....i really dun hav anytime to fool around except for yester.....which was spent watching 3 hrs of vcd...shit...i really must buck up....
remember operation "save myself"..suppose to start this weekend....not a gd start.....nxt wk will be better..i should also concentrate more on bio.....ok......

yfc
work
rest

gd luck to alvin ong....

si bei busy tomolo yfc at 4 40..wth so late screw u....den got fencing in the morning...shit

got lots of stuff happened today.....

1..i tink physics got A....or maybe it is a nasty trick by everyone...i dunno.but happy
2..got 200 dollars frm some scholarship fag...lol
3..fencing meeting was cool
4..project work looks on course..finally
5..lck is going crazy....bok bok bok....haha

going to watch the vcd den mug yfc n den maybe do some chem n physics...yeah tt tt...k set...

soccer so fun.....jasmeet is the shen....lol..heard they had floorball trials.....but didnt gd.not pro enough anyway...haha....today quite happy....

then yfc right....i really dunno...i am 1 behind the average which is 6....i am 5......but i dunno if i hav enough time to complete the thing by 21st n morale is quite low now....in fact happy tt i dun need to fly.....121 also start lyk shit....so competition lar...i just do my best for every flight and leave the rest to fate lar.....

argh...the mask is rusting lyk shit...help mi...

my fren has kindly reminded mi abt my 0 cip hours.....damn u......thanks....shit man...damn sian....80 leh...dun play play
n if ken gets thru the concert auditions.....lol....it will be si bei funny

physics i tink mati.....the teacher said he expected more frm mi.....den i told him no time lar busy.....he told mi i hav no cca wat.....wat the fag...ahh but nvm....fag....gp was not bad.....lol!

cock..physics mcq....disappointing....nvm.....there is always promo..haha 10 marks off....dick.
anyway.....training quite ok..but end si bei late cock.....still got maths hw to do...the bio hw too!!! but den tt teacher keep on dun wanna photocopy the ans....wat is there prob....wah lau...den also dun let us copy.......get alive lar....studying is abt studying smart...meaning mug the ans lar.....cock head.

tomolo sian si....i better go shower n quickly start on maths hw....i tink i am falling asleep soon. wth....cannot.....got a mother of a headache....shit......n den read the physics thingy....ok.....operation must start.......kill all the fuckers everywhere i see them lol.

tts tt. k..so shower chem n physics......cock....no time....den i slp...pack bag tomolo.....bo chap liao......busy life sia......i am seriously thinking of quiting yfc.....no time.....i tink fencing is better....but wait for a wait more.....but cancel sunday booking also....

c is gd for health.got back maths common test...ok.but not entirely satisfied..i tink i wanted 60...not 54...crap.but nvm...
project proposal kenna reject again!!!! argh. but onli a mnor part neeeds to be redone..so nvm too....haha
tomolo got double fencing training.....hmm....oh fun....ok.....looking forward to tt..... but they want $50......wth
must go cut hair nails soon....veri irritating.....wat a waste of money......
sch was ok......gp was terrible....felt sleepy tho.....physcis lect was esp super sian...but got company...so nvm

hav to borrow fencing stuff for sun.....n cancel yfc on sun
or else not go on sun n go for yfc....settle it by tomolo...must..how insanely sian n troublesome n boring! wth

onli maths tutorial 10b....chem, physics,yfc

just completed zoe 2........tt the 3 game i hav completed on the ps2.....xenosaga is still waiting.....finish tt.......n i really am itching to start FFX.....damn it man....i cant believe tt i hav FFX for lyk 2 months n still no touch it...damn..but i really must finish xenosaga first......

zoe's ending was not bad too..tho it wasnt much of a story based game....it was quite nice....

i find when i hav nothing to do....i feel very lost n sad n miserable....i should start finding something else to do....hmmm...dark cloud 2....there is a game shop in pasir ris..i should go look....should i go tonite.....or should i read harry potter......yes i am re reading bk 3......ahh..happy happy mi....

use power to do right things......or at least use it to do things you believe in...

kinda lost now...if onli...really dunno wat to do...no fire to do anything for tt matter....if onli.....lost empty...

u all tink funny n laugh......u noe how miserable i am.....miserable is the correct word

i knew it lar......died...hiaz.dun even noe how to describe..i just screwed up...big time....should hav failed straight away...i meant i totally lost it lar.....in the end whole row of fours.....stupid motivational talk n screwing n a shattered mi.....i dun even feel lyk going back to yfc anymore.....wat did i do wrong.....low on theory part? i mean all the small details no one bothers lar...it is not onli me....the taxying i just lost control of the plane.....crashed nearly...i dunno y also...asked qian li alreadi...brakes.....maybe i am just not suited......r/t calls.....also dunno y lar.....remember mi ....dis s sickening....oh...man....i really feel sick...wat do i say when i say my pri instructor....nothing man i dunno wat to say...all the landmarks everyone dunno......y i kenna....dis is very terrible....i tink it is the worse day of the year....n all the shit n crap....maybe he means well....but dis is demoralising shattering watever....

mon is holiday....i just dun feel lyk going to sch to face anyone.....

soccer lan n the arcade didnt help making the day better....a little...but but.....hiazz....dis really really suck....wanted to cry....but couldnt...but cant really express the fuck up ness......i tink it is all my fault....just phase mi out lar....i am not suited.....1 hour of pure screwed up ness n insults n so on......

blister pain man.....cresent moon tonite...just got home...went to eat at dis place which was packed wif pple...wah lau....anyway the onli interesting thing is tt the 2 women eating mango pudding when i walked in was driking tea when i walked out after 1 hour....pro-ness....si bei a lot of time...gonna watch tv n mug yfc n play ps2 later..shiok....hope a nice gd flight tomolo....really must get tt attitude n horizon business settled once n for all...it is sick getting it stuck in my brain...fag..i am such a kelong.....haha

5 expected 6 gd 7 better...heehee come on 5 preferably 6

flying tomolo..yeah....hav to go mug thru the nite for it......new instructor.....freaky man....n den my pri instructor say a lot of funny things..messing mi up..totally confused...fag.....then got fencing com...shitz....i got to plan my booking tomolo lar....hiaz.....i tink wed 4 th....sat 1n2......fri 4.dun cancel lar...n sun all....tentative...must figure everything out by tues..or earlier.....

busy busy week ahead...n i am freaking out abt tomolo....cos it is SARAHTI.....or watever.......wah lau....n indian female instructor....die.......mug mug mug....

but at least cts are over! todays fencing training......the coach wasnt here.......WAH LAU!

i ren ming liao lar....the past few hours was rather enjoyable...in front of the tv....watching.....just not using the brain at all....ahh....so fun.......give up liao....bio i will really no mood to study......just waiting....n waiting for 10 30 tomolo.....hiazz....i tink i am quite pathetic....iwas just thinking abt wat i might be doing 1 yr ago...definitely not as pathetic as now...after dis wk is over....i better wake up....at least.....now i now i am not awake....wat i fear is tt maybe some day.....i will forget to wake up cos i forget tt i am slping....den.....be consumed in a downwards spiral to hell....tt is terrible u noe...i am not sure when dis phase will pass....n whether i will go into the forget tt i am slping mode....tt is something i am terrified of....seen real life examples of people destroying themselves....2 in fact....n tt is too many....in fact i dunno y....people do tt to themselves....i guess they just dunno u noe...n....i also dunno y i am in such a state now.....u noe? n the tv show just now showed a girl just wanting to die....it seems lyk when u r in it u dun noe....so how would i noe if i am in it.....

tt y.....i must succeed.....cant worth to fail...onli one way...n very often....nvm...but i would let myself degrade anymore.....save myself.....how apt....yes.it will be torture...but just think of the end result...isnt the process...it is the end result....come on..determination......

gd luck to my bio....i will need all my brains.....hoping to pass.....B would be fantastic...C or D would be good...hoping at least pass but would lyk a C at least......thanx

You represent... anger. Mad at the world, eh? You have a tendency to... freak out easily. Overly emotional about everything, you're most prone to bouts of cruelty and moodiness. Other people may be afraid of the fact that you explode so easily, but at least you're honest... even if you're honest about not liking anything...

s paper.....y everyone kao bei.......i thot it is do well for promos can alreadi? oh but they were saying lyk if u wanna appeal u must hav good ct results...shit...so i have to nail promos....or i am finished....alamak.....must get 2......it is damn difficult lor....hiazz..shit man...they say 1 is useless....tt means 2 or nothing which means i am dead cos i cant really depend on ct n i dun forsee 2 A.....1 for maths...bio is gone......physcis n chem...hiaz screw up leh...how....just pray n let fate decide....no choice...i dun hav i choice....man...regretting should hav studied harder n at least can use dis as a guage but now....forget it......tomolo is coming soon

fri......bio paper....finish liao do ipw.......aiya damn man.....dey all going out but i stuck wif ipw....shit.....den after tt....wat should i do......i must mug yfc at nite....ok....shall cycle to a nice n far away place to stone.... ahhh....hmm...gd....

i tink i am more screwed up than ever before.....but after ct..operation "save myself " starts rite....gd gd.....time for some major saving.....stone man.......fuck bio

aiya....no flight tomolo...as usual....sat lar pls...despo liao..tomolo free......so i hav to do the project proposal......hiazz.....n tomolo is bio lor.....i am getting a headache....argh.....shit obsessed wif 720 n 1440....physics died.....made a lot of stupid errors lar...n a few i dunno.but the amt of errors i make r disgustingly alot.....hiazz.....i dunno how to change tt.....n so cos mi not to be abt to do the qn....argh...quite piss wif myself....hiazz.but everything ends tomolo..so fuck care.....

sad sad sad......i dunno y....yfc....n physics....

retrospect..chem was quite a disaster...but nvm tt....more worried abt project proposal n the looming cut at yfc.....which i am certain to be included if i dun skip sch next 2 wk.....shit.....life is in a mess....

chem done.....yeah....actually to be honest.....the paper was not a difficult one...onli so funny qn...but it was an ok paper......BUT.......my calculations....go haywire....alamak....for a few qn....shit man..or else shiok liao..den as espected..dey give a super spas complicated crap calculation...which was damn easy.but but...er..i see wrongly.....argh.....n the stupid energy cycle forgot to balance....but at least i tink i will the paper wasnt beond mi..just lack of practice n spd perhaps...esp the calculations......just need to work on tt.......

veri happy.....tt chem is gone.....tt y i am smiling...not cos i nailed it..as i told cj.......the paper fuck mi....not the other way round.....

rest mug physics n bio n do project.....hiaz....2 more...

hiaz....damn sian...dun feel lyk tinking abt chem.....i tink everything will work out tomolo.....hopefully it is ok....but i just dun wanna disappoint myself can alreadi......n it is just 2hrs....over pretty soon...den got 2 more papers...other pple onli 1.....i really shouldnt hav taken bio.....argh.....nvm.....tt was lame......

i tink i shall go sleep soon..trying to make myself feel sleepy..always tried to sleep early b4 exam...does it help......i dun tink so....still as tired as ever...i just dun wanna punish myself anymore...by being awake.....

n it is not tt i dun wanna tell u...but wat does it do even if i tell u....u cant solve it....dun wanna be a burden...prefer keeping it to myself.....

n i mbfc......wth......fag....

in 10 hrs time.....shall be slogging over chem...a little interested in the paper....no disappointments....gd luck to myself.....

there is this petrol station.....n it was always open....when u need it...it's there.....it is yourself....

fuck lar die....kick out....kick out....waste time....waste time...waste money...fuck u lar...knnbccb....go to hell lar....