ARGH...why did Newcastle have lose...That is damn gay! Especially when they had lead for 89 minutes of the match...and even more so since Charlton lost! Now, the 4th placed team, which is Charlton is 3 points ahead of Newcastle, Liverpool and Fulham all tied at 5th. The mid-table really is a crowded place to be....so NUFC...shall move up to 4th soon! LOL

After another slack night...I tried to do maths but failed and ended up doing chemistry and physics questions....I am greeted by the prospect of having double training tomorrow and the words of my senior predicting impending academic failure lingering in my head.

It is good that people can simplify things for themselves. Usually, we tend to make matters so much more worse than reality. I use to be able to do that too. And am trying to do that now.

I shall be off to do a LOT of work today..productive productive!!!!

"Be productive for the good of the state"..If you paint those words in red, say it in accented chinese and strike a posture with your nose tilted slightly into the air right arm bent at the elbow at shoulder height with right fist placed onto of your heart....

Woah..some much description...
Who do you think you will look like?

I have nothing against Chinese..but something against some chinese.....LOL

I fear lessons...petrified, terrified.

Just as I was wondering how come everyone is so into love, loving and lovers..thereafter known as 3Ls....I ask asked the "are you attached" question. And read about a sad soul writing about his feelings...OMG...I am really heartless. I have seriously no idea how emotions can be so powerful. The only emotions I usually experienced would be anger, sadness, ocassionally happiness and vengeance.

I have a TON of work to do. Yet, I am still slacking and blog surfing...DANG

By the way, I have realised that everyone's lives are so different from each other. It is such an amazing thing...so different in ways..but yet in the end, it is the same. WOAH.

I am crapping and feeling extremely sleepy...shall go do some work before watching BOB...good bye for the day....hopefully.

Shit...something just came through my mind...yesterday's chat with YF was largely a pure waste of time...I know you are reading this...I am doing it on purpose. LOL. Ok..except for a few sentence of value. Anyway, through that chat I realised that maybe I are not really interested in studying. I mean look at all the really interested people in the library studying those university level books..all in the name of knowledge. I am really impressed. Some might say they are muggers and all. But the problem is such determination is difficult to come by and often the key to success. Having being complemented on possessing a good brain, I am thinking how much justice I have done...in the event that I really do have a brain..to it...I have figured out that I don't really have a passion for anything....not even studies. The fact that I am a good student isn't testimony to anything except that I can reproduce what the teachers want in a fixed amout of time...ok...I think the conversation was useful...

And I think I really want to be the best...in fencing...and in studies...but yes...fencing..

Stupidity

Stupidity is terrible...thanks to peoples' and my own, many unfortunate things have happened. Today, I mourn the lost of my trusty and beloved nokia 8250..thanks to stupidity. Once again, techonolgy isn't water's best friend.

I am still feeling unsettled.

I did a flag day CIP for the Red Cross today. It gave me invaluable insights to human nature. I really want to write everything down, but it will take too long. Besides, the many lessons and things seen today can't be sufficiently expressed in mere words. The CIP has also make me decide on 2 things.

Thou shall donate when approached.
Thou shall take the leaflets people hand out.

It doesn't really take much to do the above...but it will go a long way...I think.

I still have a lot of undone homework...which is seriously pissing me off...

I am still treated like dirt by certain people

A lot happened today. But I am so sick that I don't find like writing. In short, a day of extremes.

And once again, I am faced with a dilemma. The question to ask is...What is my limit?...knowing that answer would be critical to solving my problems....

In fact, with that answer, my problems will be solved instantly...

Do you know the answer...? Contact me

I rather be happy alone than sad with you all...so you people can kiss my ass, go eat shit, and die....I will make sure of that.

Just polished off yet another packet of Tom Yam flavour instant noodles. If for some reason instant noodles are cancerous...which I have heard many rumors about that....I think I will be pretty much dead. Anyway, I used the microwave safe cooking pot this time around...so everything went very smoothly. I think the pot is rather well designed. Its bottom just fits a cake of noodles and there is a double layer so that it can be handled even with the contents boiling away!

OHOHOH...I just found some really high class belgium chocolates in the refrigerator courtesy of my auntie. There sure is a difference from your regular kit-kat or cadbury chocolates. Firstly, really nice packaging..there isn't any of that disgusting aluminium foil! Secondly, all the individual pieces have different tastes, unique designs and cool names and lastly, what I like most is that they come with this leaflet detailing all the designs and flavours of the chocolates in the box...WOAH!...talking about value added products...haha

Have been getting sudden bouts of rashes all over my body recently...I suspect it is the silk quilt that is the culprit..maybe not...but if it is, then it's a real shame...

I completed my GP presentation, did 1 question from Maths S..still agonising over integration, absentmindedly REDID parts of chemistry tutorial 15, and shall go find more work to do....

For the record,
to pork: I am not ahead...going under real soon...can sense it coming
to yf: thank you for your really practical gift and now that I have used it, I can't "re-give" it

Just some musings....

Is Yeo Feng pronounced YO FENG or YAO FENG...I have come across people who have used the latter..
If this is the first time you are seeing the "allele", would you pronounce it as AH-LE-LE?
Why is everyone obsessed about being loved, loving, lovers and people's love lives?

Weird world isn't it?...off to mug...bye

Freezing Singapore

It has been raining everyday since the second day of CNY...that makes it a long long time. And it hasn't be just drizzles, but pouring torrential rain. The weather is just so cold these days...Brrrrrr...I wonder if this is due to gobal warming and the greenhouse effect...LOL

Yesterday was disgusting. I slept with the computer, lights and everything else on....after reading the lastest issue of TIME magazine. DAMN...Didn't do much...hiaz...that is why, I have to make it up all today...

Today was actually going to be a long day with Physics S lecture from 5 pm to 7pm. However, it seems the lecture, who is also my physics tutor fainted in class and can't continue on today. I hope he is all right man! On the subject of teachers, some PE teachers are really overbearing...to the extent of making want to shoot them dead on the spot..haha

Currently, I am in love with a particular Sally Yeh song and today I get to watch the channel U drama serial at 7 pm!!!! YES!! I am happy

Shall go fill in my homework diary and plan the rest of the day....hoping for a productive end to a normal day....

hahaha....the past is sweet...the present isn't...but what if in the future you think of the present now?.....

Sometimes, somethings just don't turn out the way you want them.

Hitler's Army

My cousin is getting married to a German. She came visiting today in the evening together with her German fiancee and his parents. If this isn't called fate I don't know what is. Too bad that I had to leave for training just the moment they arrived and was thus denied the pleasure of interacting with the guest from afar...hiazz...mourning a lost opportunity....Actually, I am not sure what would I ask them, but I am certain that I would have loved to have a conversation with them...hiaz

Training is very good today and I just managed to finished the last question of Physics S, which is supposedly quite tough. A combination of luck, logical deduction and lots of mathematics...haha...I am satisfied. The problem is, the night is far from over.

Currently resting, then I will proceed on to finish the odd and ends of Physics S, complete the irritating GP presentation and finish up some homework...

My routine is quite fixed these days..but I ain't saying it is good...

Crescent moon covered partially by clouds tonight...just goes to show how late I get home everyday...I can see the moon from my room...woah!

So tired, yet so energized...the siege mentality they call it...and a powerful weapon with the odds against me and the evils of the world nearby.

I will make you pay dearly...just you wait and see who has the last laugh.

Today is terrible...Maths S Paper is screwing up my monday training. And today is monday. So in short, training was screwed up. But I can't afford the time to moan and groan and cry over spilled milk. I have set a few goal. One would be to put in 100% effort in ALL trainings..something I haven't been able to do in the past and didn't do today. Secondly, I want to perfect the "3 step" drill I didn't manage to do properly today...on the plus side, I did manage to lunge...actually is over-lunge and hit twice. But the problem is I don't know if over-lunging is good because I can't recover after that...shall think about that. Thirdly, I want a top 8 finish in FSC...

I am pondering over S paper lecture vs training and training vs OCS...so screw it...

Boy am I busy today. Just managed to read my friend's blog who has written an extremely good post on blogging. However, he does not agree that a blog is a personal dumping ground for emotions and goes on to say how his blog is an avenue for his sorrow, frustration and joy. Isn't it the same? An uglier word for avenue would be dumping ground. But of course, there is a difference between the choice of these 2 words. One suggests uselessness and contempt while the other appreciates the outlet provided by a blog for emotional release....But implied meanings aside, I think a blog indeed is a place to lay those emotions to rest. It is a form of recording one's life to satisfy the human psychic. We all want others to know what we think...Nonetheless, a very good read..so please go

I am not a fan of sweets but I find Cadbury Choclairs extremely nice. Go try them too.

bye bye....

The 90/10 method seems totally suited for me...but right now, I need to grumble a bit...

The day isn't so bad up til now, but certainly could have been better. Realised that my irresponsible and disgusting brother has damaged the few months old family car. THAT STUPID IDIOTIC MORON..! And to my horror, when I arrived in school, I realised that I forgot to wear my court shoes, which in the reason why I am able to blog at home now. Because after lunch with the class, I chiong home to change the pair of shoes...WHAT A WASTE OF TIME..and within 10 minutes, I have to rush back to school for Maths S Paper lecture..

The journey home took 30 mintues...that is really too long. Much of it was spent walking home from the MRT station. I should really remember to bring the key to unlock the bike so that I can cycle home. The problem is I keep on forgetting...will get it duplicate instead....haha..eradicating the problem instead of solving it...but the situation was alleviated by the sights on the way home...LOL

Just had ice-cream, am broke again and have suffered wrong accusations by my angel...damn it...I shall write again...WTH....

A busy day with training to end it all....going only for 1.5 hours out of the 3 hours...feeling a little gulity...I shouldn't though..all I need is to thrash everyone 2 weeks later...hmmm...YES....by the way, NAPFA trial test was ok...did the pp, SBJ and FLEXI easily...I actually wanted to clock 11 minutes for the 2.4km run..halfway through withe time at 5 mins 30 secs, which is right on schedule, I decided to speed up and try to go under 10 minutes...which required 3 rounds of 1 min 30 secs each..I managed to do that for the 4 th round...but the 5th and 6th took a total of 3 minutes 45 secs...thus ending with a time of 10 minutes and 45 secs...some 30 secs slower than last year...

YUCKS.....1 minute and 52.5 secs per round...YUCKS

Within the last 5 sentences, I have typed so many "minutes" and "secs"...gay...

back to school man........BYE!

I wonder what do I consider as hardworking...actually, if my results are good, I don't really give a damn...LOL...

A question...why does everyone sleep so late..and how can they stand it? If msn is anything to go by, most people are active during 10 pm to 1 am...weird...

Feeling very hungry just now, I wanted to cook some instant noodles using the microwave oven. So I put the noodles in a pot, and the pot into the oven. I feel uneasy. But couldn't put my finger on anything so feeling satisified, I set the timer to 4 minutes and went back to my room. Halfway through, I keep on hearing sparks and went to the kitchen to check. And there was this pungent smell of burning plastic....the pot wasn't microwave safe..and I am DAMN SURE the plastic was giving of that odour. So down the drain went a packet of noodles...thank god there wasn't any explosion or anything...phewwww!

Anyway, I discovered that Arts Central do show quality and interesting documentary from time to time. The last time it was doing this special in relation to the LOTR and how the characters in the show reflect past and modern rulers. Tomorrow, there is this show on samurai Japan..and today, I watched spytrek, which is a documentry on spying during the cold war period and the related equipment, training and all. Woah..definitely an hour well spent...the problem is it is way pass my bedtime...and I am slacking too much.....

WTH

My brother's friends are here. They have been gambling for at least 2 hours. Ocassionally, one could hear...through closed doors...the laughing, yelling and sighing..together with the sound of coins. It makes me wonder why is gambling so addictive. I feel like having a go too, but I can't be bothered to waste the time...I have work to do...and tomorrow will be a very very long day..hiaz...in fact this coming week will be extremely busy...

I hope I can get the digital camera soon...

My head is hurting from attempting hydroxy compounds...actually doing ahead isn't very productive if you go by time spent per tutorial. But I am sick of studying and would prefer to do something. And it has been a few weeks already and no one has approached me for tuition. I need to find a way to make some money. I have decided to set up a website giving free online help to secondary and JC students. I am doing it to atone my previous sins...

Will have my first competition in 2 weeks time...in 2 weeks time, you will find a very happy me, and many sad people around me....bye

My Dad's friend and his family is currently having lunch outside. I fancy my parents are really very good hosts this CNY. Anyone who comes and stays til meal time will sure have food...proper food. So guys, before the CNY is over, and there are 15 day of it, do come do and have a meal oor something..just for the festive spirit of treating and giving...woah...who says CNY is dead and boring? LOL...

I especially hate people who ask me why are you so free or why are you on the computer everyday instead of studying...I will get highly irritated because it implies that I am lazy...and I am not.

Besides proper meals, alcoholic beverages, CNY goodies, canadian pizza, the DVD of Homerun has become another staple for guests in my house...haha

Off to do work...I hope for a productive day....

I hear a nice song on FM93.3 on the way to training this morning around 8am...got home...had a hunch it was sung by Sally Yeh...and out of so many other million songs, I found it....

My luck is really good...I sunk at least 10 shots during basketball today...and I suck at basketball...HAHAHA....

It sure feels good to have things your way....AND it will stay that way...

ARGH...Newcastle lost to Liverpool in the FA Cup match...how disgusting and disappointing...

I think this CNY is brought the most visitors to my house. About 5 batches in all and 1 more to expect. The number of Hongbaos collected have dwindled to around 10. However, it is always quality over quantity. Thus, despite the bad economy...LOL...I have received $416 dollars in cold hard cash...haha...Food was also better...much better...Last night, when my dad's colleagues came visiting ( They are really a stingy bunch. Only the Singh give us Hongbaos...those chinese are disgusting...brought the whole family to free-load ), my parents whipped up such a sumptuous spread consist of roast pork and duck, shark fin soup with crab meat, abalone and NORTH HOKKAIDO SCALLOPS, curry chicken, beehon and much more. WOAH...yummy...

Oh, aftering visiting lck's house, I have decided to beautify my room too. Just that cost is a major factor here...lol

How time can change things....

Today's training is slack too..amazingly...on the 8th Feb, I will enter myself into the FSC 2004...I really hope to do well...at least quarters or semis depending on how many opponents there are. But I am not letting myself lose to any J2s...I HATE LOSING TO J2S and anyone I deem a lesser opponent....we shall see...I believe I can do it....

perseverance

I have almost decided to get a Canon A70...now, to bargain for the cheapest price.

It has rained the whole day! And the rain was real strong! Really caused much inconvenience in moving about from place to place. But, the class outing to lck's house was really fantastic! To think that I was considering whether to go due to the bad weather, the change of meeting time and my tiredness. However, I might the RIGHT choice by going...LOL

Firstly, I have to apologize to my classmates for making them wait for me at the MRT station...haha..I wasn't the latest though. Then, lck when down and brought us to his house. THe decor is really good. The style is modern simple and dominating features would be the white and metallic look. Not terribly creative or unique, but pleasing to the eye. A break would be the balcony where some zen style was achieve through the use of pebbles lining the floor.

DAMN! I am currently trying to get the soundtrack of The Last Samurai from kazza...and it screwed up! I am afraid that I might get caught one day...

About half of the class went and I had a great time there watching TV, talking, exploring the house having "yu sheng" and of course, playing cards. It seems like the papers weren't wrong at ALL. My luck is so DAMN good. I ended up joined first with lck in daidee, with allel losing by 17 cards and matthew by 2. I could have extended the lead if not for some adventurous playing style, and some really where I could have ended up the winner. Just to show you how lucky I was, in the first game, allele and lck put down a pair each...and I was third...and the game ended...MATTHEW DIDN'T EVEN PUT A SINGLE CARD DOWN! HAHAHA!...4 cards from the other 3 players only! WOAH

By the way, I saw a royal flush today laid down by lck...it was all hearts...this is the first time I see a royal flush in an actual game, without techniques I may add...haha

Stayed there about 2 hours and when we were leaving, lck give us tangerines. In the spirit of CNY, we made him say something to each of us...He told me..."Don't be so guai lan..." haha!

Shit, my $880 LCD monitor seems to be acting up. Either the connection is poor or the screen itself have some problem. I just realised that the display a tinge too yellowish. Although, I have managed to wriggle the connection back so that it is ok now, hmmm, I better go get it checked out before the warranty expires! It is only a year old man! How pissing! I realised most stuff I bad from him always spoilt. Bloody hell!

What was left of the class ended up watching "The Last Samurai". I hope they find it as enjoyable as I did. And here am I, recording down today...again...

Shall go watch BOB later...and rest the whole night...LONG day ahead tomorrow!

I have received Raymond's card for the CNY. Thank you. Then, had a talk with my cousin about life in general and the future.

Here comes the California.....oh no..it is called Canadian Pizza...again haha...

Oh! I shall blog about the recent food I ate. Nope, it aint going to be about the CNY goodies because they are all the same every year...nor would it be about the reunion dinner..because for the amount of money spent, the food was terrible...the saving grace was actually the soup...BUT STILL....it cost $200 over!

Last night, I ate, INSTANT NOODLES...lol...CHU QIAN YI DING's hot sesame oil flavour, with my favourite crab sticks, North Hokkaido frozen scallops, cabbage, fishballs and Moon brand abalone. Acutally, I think crabsticks should be fried and not soaked in soup. It makes the sticks so mushy and they unroll by themselves..that just kills the taste and destroy the texture. The north hokkaido scallops are huge..very huge. They are generally about 3-4 cm in diameter and 2 cm in thickness. I have always had the impression that Japanese products are always of high quality and this has been no exception. Japan hour has always shown all those fresh juicy yummy looking seafood on TV, and finally, I have come close to sampling THE taste. Instant noodles of course, to me, is always delicious. HAHAHA..It really is a great invention. Not too long ago, the Japanese ambassador to Singapore hailed instant noodles as the greatest Japanese culinary invention...

argh...argh argh...ARGH..I just hit the corner of my brother's bed frame....WTH...IT IS DAMN PAINFUL...blood is coming out.....ARGH....DAMN PISSED....

tomorrow, I am going to show some power...

Today, the rain has been rather heavy. Returned home from training about 30 minutes ago. I still have a long way more. Didn't do much today. But this might spell trouble from the little people turning up tomorrow...the much feared...LESSON...haha

I am not very satisified with training today..I don't know why. Maybe I am just wanting too much. But that is always a good thing. My cousin and his family his here, visiting...

still trying to hunt for a digital camera....hmmm....I hope I don't waste this day away...

The power supply unit of the computer was making a ruckus just now. I hope my computer don't give way anytime soon. Feeling extremely tired too. There is still training tomorrow. Looks like I have to give visiting lck's house a miss....hiazz....

Yf came at around 9 pm today. Got himself hopelessly lost in the estate and I went to Blk 122 to ferry him over to my house via the new bicycle. It isn't very suitable for ferrying an extra person because of the shape of its frame. I think they are called "Y shaped frames". Anyway, several interesting things....1. the brakes of the new bike is called "JIANYUAN"...lol...what a conicidence! 2. When you are bored, you tend to do very idoitic things. For your information, I have spent the last 2 hours or so watching a totally thrash Hongkong movie. It is the worst show ever made. Literially no substance at all. To think that just 24 hours ago, I was in the cinema at Jurong Entertainment Centre watching "The Last Samurai". Speak about contrast...haha...
3. A good way, at least that is what I think, of saving money is to turn on the air conditioner for about 20 odd minutes to chill the air just before you sleep, then switch it off and use the fan. The results are quite good.

And so the second day of CNY pass without much to say...and the third has arrived half an hour ago....

Second day of CNY. My mind is on the third. I am trying not to think. But I can't. Yet I shouldn't

The weather around here seems quirky. It would just suddenly rain. After a shower, everything seems to have its colour washed off. It looks like there is a fine mist hanging in the air to give all the trees, roads and buildings a light bluish tinge.

Good things really end fast. Cliche as it might be, the shortest time spent is always during enjoyment.

Some of my relatives are here, visiting the new house. I can see my cousin is obviously utterly bored. The PS2 is just lying there collecting dust and he can't wait to play it. It is a good time to observe human behaviour, just like all those sociologists do. So far, he is keeping quiet.

I am waiting for the California pizza to arrive. Bored to hunger. LOL. I have ran out of storybooks to read. Recently, I am being reading much more than the past few years put together. This gives me a certain sense of insecurity. Why am I so free? Considering the experimental nature of this year ( I am undertaking a lot of things that a have never done before in a very important academic year that will determine my future ), I feel less than assured

Just struggled to do a few pp....bye

I just come home from the movies. It was $8.50 well spent. I bet the experience can't be replaced by pirated DVDs or VCDs...or originals for that matter. For a guy so strongly into the ideology of "price reduction of intellectual property for the majority consumption"
, this is the highest praise a movie can get...from me.

The plot of the movie is highly original. I haven't personally come across anything along these lines. There were so many powerful and impactful moments during the show and they taught me a great deal about things. In fact, the show was littered with many quotable phrases and scenes worth retelling. But I will have to limit this or else I might just end up going through all 2.5 hours of it...haha

The scene where Tom Cruise's character got beaten repeatedly onto the ground, but he kept getting up and retriving the wooden sword.

preseverance

When he fought for his life in the woods against the samurais at the start.

determination

In the end, where he fought the Japanese Imperial Army.

Courage and self belief

The whole show....

The spirit.


...A man just does what he can, until his destiny is revealed to him...

I have to draw all the positives from this show into my own life now, because I am in a situation where I need to muster all my self belief...and trust that I can do it......

....to excel in both areas....and to return in glory....

It has no significance; it's just a reunion. A chance to see all your relatives again. In China where relatives can be hundreds of miles away, it's a rare chance.

-someone said of the reunion dinner on Chinese New Year Eve

WHAT THE MOTHER FUCKING FUCK IS THIS FUCKER TALKING ABOUT?!?!?!?

The obvious significance of a reunion dinner is in the name itself. Oh my goddness...even YF agress with me...and this is a highly unlikely thing to happen if the matter didn't contain some sex in it. So, I conclude that I am right!

The dinner in my humble opinion is for the family to gather and to have a meal together. This might actually occur many times over the course of a year, but to have it on the eve is a way of concluding the past year and to welcome the new year together as a whole family. Maybe, the significance of such an ocassion is just that, to be together....

and you are telling me there is not significance. It is such fuckers that rule the whole these days. No tradition upbringing at all. I bet you can't speak chinese. You are a disgrace to the race. Despite your 1600 SATS score, your excellent academic record, your biology olympiad gold medal, you are seriously such a pathetic excuse for a Chinese. It is why an Indian minister is teaching the majority of 75% of Chinese in this country how should we study chinese. One of the ways is to use English to teach...FUCK

On a separate note, I have finished the book "Band of Brothers", returned the "Laundry Man" a day late, decided to write to ST to complain about the lack of efficiency in the Singapore Police Force and found out that an automatic hand dryer is the most useless invention I have come across.

I need to mug.

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!....

It seems the festive spirit is really muted, but it ain't going to stop me from enjoying the CNY! Pity I was so darn tired last night and fell asleep at god knows what time. It was early though, I am sure of that. This makes it the 3rd countdown I missed this year...1. new year, 2. my birthday, 3. cny......

Gosh....2004 THE YEAR OF MISSED COUNTDOWNS......

I am hoping that countdowns are the only things I am going to miss. There are a zillion more dreadful things that I would be mighty pissed if I missed them. So, make sure I don't...haha

Those traditional chinese songs are floating into my window. Courtesy of my neighbours. Thank you!

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY....LALALALALALA

By the way, I have a new bed set. It is made of SILK...OMG...no wonder I slept early and well last night...haha

For my birthday wish....

I just want two things...that and that

World peace isn't one of them.....

It can't be THAT obvious can it? I better tone it down man. I saw that knowingly smile. Sickening.

I am waiting from my reunion dinner....in a light mood

Thanks to all that wished me...especially people like zp ( I didn't think of a birthday wish. He thought it for me ), my class ( ahh, pity all the threats didn't materialise ) and.....nothing else

fatigue. I am tired.

But yesterday, we did a Band Of Brothers. 5 people, a night of maddness and fun.

Bedok jetty, making out, stars, broke, food, showering, talking....ahhhhh.....

When they said that JC life was going to be good, they didn't lie. I just didn't expect it to be good in such a way.

Right now, I am preparing to go to school. I don't feel very well, but at least I have more or less recovered from the bout of flu. Today, I shall give myself a treat...I still don't know how though.

Shall write more tonight.

It's 6 hours and 41 minutes into my birthday. I did woke up at 12am plus, after reading the storybook, BUT I was just to tired to post. I think I will do it later, in the lull between school and training...

In stark contrast to last year, when I was so excited to turn 17....where is the excitement?

It just shows I am one tired person.....hiaz....what a screw up begining to my 18 years on earth...I am starting to feel sorry for myself...!

OK....today's training was terrible...except for the fencing part. I have realised that I am not aggressive at all. And my attacks are slow and predictable, which is sickening because I cannot do all the attacking drills properly which means I get screwed. And if others can do it, why can I? That is THE question man! I think my reflexes are really so slow...as examplified by the mask drill thingy today..and reflexes is something that is rather hard to train...ARGH

Hey man, tomorrow, I will show the kids some attacking power...Don't think I can't do it. BECAUSE I CAN. I shall focus more on reflexes and attacking drills.....

I am so damn tired now.....bye.....

I just borrowed a book from the school library today...its "Band of Brothers"...a very interesting book to read...haha..got pretty inspired by the TV series...so there goes another few days in dreamland, fantasizing about a life that isn't mine.

School still hasn't been very taxing yet. Simply because I am rather slack. Damn. I better be more on...SIAN

Training later. And to top it all of, GP comprehension test tomorrow. What the hell!

It is be a long day today. I shall stop reading and start working...

ARRGGGHHHH...I am offically down with a bout of flu! DAMN IT...

Feeling extremely weak now. So if anyone wants to bump me off the face of earth can do it right now...

There is still school and training tomorrow...God save me. By the way, LKY is really very arrogant. But I guess he does have the capability, so maybe that gives him the right to be arrogant.

I just saw and advertisement for "The Rise of Hitler". It is now on VCD and DVD. It is one show I would like to watch due to my fascination with Hitler. I am no neo-nazi...haha...I just find the man incredible. All great rulers usually have to leave their mark somehow...Hitler just choose a slighty different way...a rather bad way in my opinion.

I think I am going to have a headache soon...damn...All craps can go eat shit and die...!

I am dying from flu and training this morning didn't help the situation. I am so damn tired, half asleep, feeling drowsy and feeble. AND, so many important things are coming up, like CNY which is my favourite festival of the year!

Damn...TO HELL WITH PE TOMORROW. I WOULDN'T TAKE PE. TO HELL WITH THE PE TEACHERS TOO!

I haven't touched the ps2 since school started. I am feeling guilty because I have been neglecting it. Besides, there are about three games that I bought, BUT, haven't even touched it yet. What the hell

Why on earth is everyone trrying to get money from me? Die all you bloody blood sucking suckers...

I'm hoping that I can starting clocking in some serious mugging time today. Then, maybe have some PS2 fun, and rest early....

Yet another torrid week is going to start!...Thank heavens that CNY is next week. I shudder at the thought of a full week...I will die...

I HATE BEING SICK...THIS IS SUCH A NICE DAY AND I AM FREAKING HELL SICK

mother pissed off there....

I used to think that I could not go on
And life was nothing but an awful song
But now I know the meaning of true love
I'm leaning on the everlasting arms

If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it

1 - I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread my wings and fly away
I believe I can soar
I see me running through that open door
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly

See I was on the verge of breaking down
Sometimes silence can seem so loud
There are miracles in life I must achieve
But first I know it starts inside of me, oh

If I can see it, then I can be it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it

Repeat 1

Hey, cuz I believe in me, oh

If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, there's nothign to it

Repeat 1

Hey, if I just spread my wings
I can fly
I can fly
I can fly, hey
If I just spread my wings
I can fly
Fly-eye-eye

Been playing too much final fantasy? Like real! But then again...

and thus we part. Living the dream once, together. It was just a decision, an explanation. And now we are separated by an invisible line. One, no, now it is two, walking off into the sunset. Not looking back at the place where they shed sweat tears and blood, they spread their wings and flow off. Bidding them farewell, I too turned and walked, into the place where I shed sweat blood and tears...
,

I just spent the whole day..or rather afternoon watching the team competition...hiaz...nothing much to say really, but just that always remember you have the power to change your life. Don't ever think that your life is out of your control, because more often than not, the courage to change is much more difficult than the change itself. And it is always people lacking in that courage to make an important decision that complaint about fate and all.

I still need to return the Laundry Man to a national library...can anyone help me?

And I finally got a haircut at one of those 10min-per-cut shops that have sprang up all over Singapore recently. It is terribly as usual due to my unwillingness to give clear instructions, and basically my bo chapness about my hair...Just that I hope I can pass the recheck! I don't want a white slip!

Today, out of a sudden, I have a cold/flu/ whatever. Please go away. I have training tomorrow...

You know, many have told me encouraging things. And at times, I used those words to rally myself. But I wonder how much longer can I deceive myself. Either I stop or I do it. And I think I will do it. I started of with the end in mind. I will finish at the end.

I have many things to say...but I am just to sick to type it out..just too jaded....

I actually wanted to write a long entry today, detailing everything on my mind right now....but I guess it isn't meant to be....

This is such an emotional outlet....

Swore a lot today....I am so sorry...

Good night....

Just got home. I did GP last night and decided that it was enough work so I went to sleep. Somehow, I am not sure how, the air-conditioner was turned on...and I was freezing my butt off because I was too tired to get up to look for a blanket...haha

I am considering whether to play that angel mortal game thingy...It is quite a waste of time...LOL...

As usual, I got caught for having unacceptable channel during today's attire check. HIAZ...expected. Now, I have to go get a haircut by Monday, which is so troublesome, expensive and just not worth it. But I have to do it. DAMN. I'm planning to go on Saturday morning and take some time to explore Jurong further...haha

On the way to the lift lobby, I saw the workers from the furniture shop carrying, or rather trying to carry the TV console thing up. Since its dimensions are too large for the lift, they HAD to use the stairs....ALL 22 stories of the stairs..OMG...good luck to them...as I am writing, they are probably struggling up.. And boy is that thing heavy...really no joke!

Another school week has ended without much ado..lots of work..and a nagging feeling...until tonight bye!

I am not sleeping until 2am...one more hurdle to cross until a night of mugging...GP...darn!!!! OK...I will settle it by 9 10 pm...NO MATTER WHAT...

yeah, I hope you get well soon. Not because of anything but I can see the want in you and it just isn't fair that things don't go your way...

I just read this from the radio....in chinese....*abridged version*

There was a blind young boy who was begging on the streets. In front of him, there was a metal can and a card. Written on the word was the words, "I am blind. Please help me." The passer-bys were all rather compassioned people and a steady stream of coins was dropping into the can.

A young man walked passed, dropped a coin and changed the words on the card. Then, he left.

The number of people donating increased tremendously.

Today's weather is very good. But I cant see it...

Take whatever you want from this story. Should I go chinatown? hahaha...I need to chiong GP. Bye.

YEAHHHH...I found my mechanical pencil sitting prettily on the top of the OHP in 3-1 today...haha...This incident has slightly increased my confidence in RJC students. However, the recently happenings around me, which include a great deal of friends losing a great deal of money still makes me wary for the shady characters in school.

And PE sucks. I hate it. Today Zhi Kai dislocated his shoulder. It must have been terribily

Just some random thoughts today...

Physcis practicals are the least stressing, most fun to do, and easiest to complete on time.

I hate it when people screw up and waste my time trying to right their wrongs for them. ARGH.

Yesterday was totally disgusting. For the first time this year, I wasn't tired at all went I got home from training. In fact, at 11pm, I was still full of energy. On any other day, I would have chiong work. But no, I decided to sleep because I was too bored. DAMN. WHAT A TOTAL WASTE OF PRECIOUS TIME! I am not sleeping until 2 am today!!! Going to make up for lost time....why am I blogging about this?!?!

There is training tomorrow...hiaz...torturous man. It is very draining. I think I shan't spoil my mood/day by thinking about things I can't change...yeah...that is time management and worry control for you...

ok off to work...good luck to myself!

Training today was ok. Just that during combat, I need to be faster in the attacks, maybe throw in some feints, and anticipate the beats and stuff. Basically, more attention and reaction..

I did 2 reflex parries today..LOL..I don't know if that is a product of training or luck. But it felt good. And I hope it continues. Just that I want to do it consciously next time..hiaz..LONG WAY MORE...I did managed to win a senior, so that is good...shall be reviewing that bout before I sleep...

so how...I lag a lot...and I am being recognized as a gay in the squad...LOL

And, I miss my missing pencil....HIAZ....

Shall make it a point to go have dinner with the rest of the sabre team after training...I need a life and they are an awfully fun bunch to be with...But..work beckons now....WTH..........ARGHHHHHH

a nightmare...
tired...
pissed off...
time wasting...
and now my mechanical pencil is missing...I better get it back, or else...

I hope my friend took it my mistake because if it is left in class, dishonest RJC students will surely steal it...

still waiting for news...I don't remember leaving anything behind in class.....damn..but had a feeling something was left behind....

TOO PISSED TO DO WORK..this can't do!!!!!!!

Just plain pissed off...if only time could turn back or stop....

bloody hell....relativity SUCKS....fucking hell....

fuck myself

Just got home from training. It wasn't very strenous. But everything is relative isn't it not...

Relative to my seniors...I am so darn sucky. They are just too fast, too good, too experienced and too talented...I have set a deadline..END OF FEB....DL DC....here I come!

Relative to some people...I am so damn slack..I get home, and unlike the past, I take afternoon naps before heading from training. So, in the past, I did work in the afternoon..Now, I sleep...and blog...in essence..time wasting...

Shit, I can feel a headache creeping up...

Got to be more productive...bye...need to fight the sleep demons...and do work...!

shit man......I think I will only get about 30 hours from the whole Christmas Fun project....which means my estimated CIP hours is 40 plus....I am only halfway there....DAMN IT......I am damn screwed up lar.....SHIT...

I need to chiong CIP TOO......I feel like swearing now....DAMN PISSED......

Let me waste some time to blog..before rushing off to take a nap, do some work and go for training...

Today was suppose to be a 2 30pm day but I only got home at 3 30pm...The first 2 tutorials was ok...except that I suspect one of my tutors do not really know what he is teaching...and the other just wastes too much time......BECAUSE HE HAS NO POWER...hahahaha LOL.....

I excused myself from PE beacuse of my heel and the teacher wasn't that "funny" with it....It made me dislike him a little less..." run on the grass and don't bother about the speed or timing"...LOL...what more can I ask for....But PE is really a replica of training.....YUCKS.....

Then biology lecture and maths tutorial followed...with a slacky civics to end the day off...had a sort of mini class lunch in the canteen, where I was unfortunately pulled off to sell mugs there...How gay...

It seems the gays are quite happy today......And ken gave the story away....I wonder why?

Oh, and I think you know this....but....sometimes, Ivan is just a bitchy spastic gay and he deserves to get diaoed.....LOL.....attacked him like crazy today...for fun and enjoyment HAHAHAHA

By the way, Teck Beng attacked me too...and my chin is a little swollen now....GAY

I was gushing about all the IKEA stuff in my house. My house is really filled with IKEA funiture and apparels. I think it is not a very high class sort of brand, but definitely worth the money because of the way and style their furniture...multi functionality, clean cut designs and innovate usage. Plain, simple and useful! WOAH...any more and I would sound like an IKEA salesperson...

One thing though, is that IKEA apparels cost a little more than the average...and so have to assemble them yourself..but that is something quite enjoyable right?

Anyway, IKEA or not, my heel still hurts like crazy and I have embarked on a self prescribe intensive treament to cure the pain before training or rather PE tomorrow..the Philips Infraphil isn't very effective I think...so I decided to apply some of those anti-inflammatory gel...which is made in Solvakia...an Eastern European country isn't what I think would be a country that makes good medicine...maybe I am biased or something...but we shall see...I found it interesting that Solvakia actually had pharmaceutical plants....haha

anyway....i was telling someone that ALL the best RJC fencers from sabre...are ALL past champions of the novice fencing championships...I didn't even participate...HIAZ...I think that is a bad omen......my batch competed in J1....We did things so differently from the other batches........And that is why we are SO damn screwed!!! I hate my batch!

Woah...It's 12 02 am already..having a long day today....with school, training and PE....bye!

The Novices Fencing Championships....Was always an RI-RJ affair....but now....HIAZ....nicholas should have been winner but then, sometimes, the best might not always be the winner....luck and other factors that you might not be in control of actually play a big part in things....wasted about 7 hours today watching people fence....pure waste of time..and I am quite pissed......

Just did 12 pull ups...I felt really tired after that....how can I ever get to 15...with the PE and training, I really don't feel like doing extra training for pull ups. So much for new year resolutions....DAMN

got to do some work man..lets see

1. pack bag
2. mug all my subjects...
3. GP

Actually, I am quite far ahead in all my work to be honest...for physics, I have finished capacitance and 90% of current electricity is done.....for maths, tutorial 16 and 17 are almost completed, not to mention the respective assignments...as for chemistry, arenes is also almost done....

But I still feel very insecure because of my heavily packed training schedule....and once again the question of whether it is worth it pops out....sigh....the fact that I keep on treating everything that is not related to studying and to a lesser extent fencing is proof that I am highly stressed out and a little neurotic...

blogging, chatting, phone, TV, PS2....all of these....are the little things that I would like to but cannot enjoy with out feeling guilty...

I don't seem to make sense.......blabbing incoherently...*swearrrrr a lot*....

waste time bye!

I am obssessed with the new smell of my diary.....WOAH....

just for the record, my heel STILL hurts like crazy....

It is amazing how much things can be different....people are jsut separated by the choices they make at each junction in life....it wasn't the way I wanted it to be..haha...but I could also do that.....

oh today is so wasted.....did nothing much...just slept, eat and watch the darn television...I can't let a finger to do some work...hiaz...This is bad, real bad.

I have finally gotten down to buying a diary...This is a first..because I usually get them for free for all those insurance compaines or Reader's Digest......LOL...Just came back from training....and my heel is absolutely hurting like crazy. I have got to figure a way of curing it and take more care with my own body!....hiaz..stressed man....So it is 6 days a week...I don't know how to cope...But, I will because I have to...I really don't feel like thinking about thiss anymore...so I shall not...haha

I still have 12 hours of today....no...maybe 10...Lots of time to get stuff done...But right now, I can smell and hear chicken frying in the kitchen...it is lunch time....bye....!!!!

It is eating into me....taking over the heart and the mind..overwhelming all rational and logically thinking...Everything just presents itself as hatred and disappointment...devouring me from the inside....that rather painful isn't...? haha...with a bunch of callous people around you everyday...that is even worse...

I don't know what "It" is...but what I know is..."It" consist of a large part of jealousy....that I am very sure of....in fact....I am raging with it now....LOL...a sad person complaining about how the world is unfair....

today, coach talked a great deal about stuff. He said this would be the last time he bring the matter up. But I didn't want him to stop. So much for the big exams and small exams and what not....but it was the highly cliche, often used for philosophical impact, or just to explain about everything that doesn't go your way......

this is life.....accompanied by a look of resignation and the wide spreading hands......

yes...I resign to fate.....just throw it at me....

YEAH! I am training 6/7 days a week......YES......and a camp in the March June and September holidays!!!! oddly, I don't feel the implications or the impact of it yet...simply because I have decided to ignore all the alarms ringing, going overkill mode in my mind and take things a day at a time...major decision that might cause my COMMON TEST 1 and 2, prelims and A Levels..in short my future....I might just end up a moron who gave some much for nothing...haha...haha....to beat the seniors so that I can go overseas..that is a tall order....and I don't want to think what if I fail...

I really don't know...

It used to be school, fencing friends and enjoyment....I like to play computer games...fiddle with the PS2...reading soccer/games/F1 news...being online...chatting with friends...and so on...I am afraid that would have to go....and maybe soon....friends would have to go too...in the end...school and fencing..? Ten years down the road....what would I feel about all this?

I really don't know...

My dad just bought an IKEA cabinet for me...It has a zillion compartments built into this small cubiod thingy and indeed in very very useful...I can't even find stuff to fill it up. But it cost $120? WOAH...All my furniture is from IKEA and from the same series too...woah...

But still, I really don't know...

I always sleep at home before training for an hour....what a waste of time...but it is due to extreme fatigue.......

ok....today as in FRIDAY 9/1/04 IS BLOODY TERRIBLE.....terrible...horrible....

if people around me want to fuck around and have sex...I already don't care....but don't fuck with me....

and there goes $1500.......can you believe it? $1500......ARGHHHHH I feel have a heart attack if....he gets it.....

ok...today I am feeling extremely irritatble...just super pissed off. The moment I stepped into school, the feeling was there already. However, it just got worse throughout the day. The insane chemistry practical was driving me nuts..and to think that I had to stay back an hour to finish it was so pissing because I wanted to bolt home at 1230pm..
and hardwork don't always pay. Trust me..I swore a lot today...and I still think I need to swear more but....ok..WHATEVER....I think the teacher-in-charge is damn useless.and so am I...If you detach yourself and think rationally, anyone would agree that they made the right choice..you can call it jealousy..but to think that the amount of effort I put in, which is definitely more, isn't rewarded because of bureaucracy....DAMN

GP and the GP teacher are very important entities.......
I need a diary soon...

Hiaz..damn pissed....off to do work.....not for anything..but for the fact that I enjoy doing work and getting things completed.....a sense of satisfaction should help cure my day.......at least for a little....

Today was junior-senior class meeting....and I just got home man! Thats quite late.....LOL.....I slacked for two straights days.....We went to a restuarant I went to about a year ago....and did the same things I did a year ago...haha...time could have been spent on something else more..ermm..productive...like going training or resting at home or doing work....I really feel guilty for not going for training today..hiaz..But what can I do now man....at least the time spent with the class was quite cool...just that as a J2 with tons of training...I really doubt that I can afford the slacking....so maybe I should get a diary soon to pen in all those resolutions.....darn...Like....NO TIME WASTING....

PE WAS DAMN SPASTIC.....It was exactly like training with all the similar drills and all....how boring...I am sick of that....

Lots of stuff to be accomplished tonight..hiaz...which means sleep will be sacrified...

just some stuff that happened today..

...on the way home meet a bunch of fags.....who looked like they wanted a fight
...loke was on a mood swing...LOL.....
...on the bus 111 to suntec we were talking about our futures....japanese drama serials...diaoing allele...etc etc....

and I am so broke.....$15.50 for dinner today...$20 for the fencing.....$20 for class fund......

CRAPPY

Just finished a show entitled 2009 Lost Memories...woah...ok but I am screwed because from 10 45 to now...1am....I havent done a single thing...hiaz...

But it was definitely worth it....cool show...

my seniors are very accomplished in all areas...like 4As 2D B3...or something similar and A1 for CCA....and they look like a bunch of slackers and jokers and whatever who skip lessons, don't do homework and do not touch a book in 2394209353 years......talking about ZAINESS.....woah...my idols....

on the subject of training through A-levels.....I shudder at that thought....I don't want to think about it..I want to wait for the time to come when a decision must be made....then I will think....hiazz.......CT 1.......it is time to kick butt....4As please...on a silver platter with pepsi twist.....

smiling is good..trust me.....it is good....LOL....I am a gay!

just got home from a weird training....hmm...highlights.....the dumb mannequin can attacking from behind...due to coach....everyone shouted "ZHENGXIAN"....and I didnt move...after getting hit for everyone.since we were all slacking as a bunch....coach diaoed me..."zheng, i thinking you very fast, but...." WELL DONE THERE! everyone laughed......WAHHH SO GAY........!!! Why is it always me man.....haha....and every single J1 is not going tomorrow...and I am sure as hell he was damn PISSED DAMN PISSED...I don't know what has gotten into be..fear? respect? living up to expectations? or don't want to disappoint a good coach?...I really don't know...But I want to go tomorrow...the only problem is that...I need someone to go with me for the drills and I told him that I wasnt going...so I am in a FIXED....damn....btw this is my IMPORTANT year...WHY AM I SLACKING ABOUT MEETING JUNIOR CLASS.....LIKE WTH.....bad mistake....I shall go for training from now on unless it is for academic matters......nothing else....feinting is tough and so is stop-hit....need to put more effort into those....gay...hiazzz

can someone give me advice on the above?

the miw.com.sg password still won't work...made a call again..their customer service is indeed flawless..but such a waste of money using snail mail right?

I got home at 9 15pm...and am still slacking.....SHIT....hiaz shall shower after writing and work work work through the night....

I really feeling gulity...I think you can guess why....hiaz...easily swayed by people....and their expectations.....whatever...

thanks to my friend's help....I can now resuming my surfing of blogs...Just wondering why is a proxy server now need..any answers? I got a good mind to send SingNet an email to enquire about this sudden uncalled for and unannounced move

and girls are going into guys toilet...what is the world becoming to?

hiaz...at home now and training is looming in 4 hours time...I only have 3 hours of free time...yesterday was disgusting, I got home...and slept almost immediately...hiaz

busy busy busy...bye

I just read a very dumb article about surviving the first your in JC....as I am a guo lai ren....or an authority on the subject...as pereira would put it...

1. changing of ex school unifrom just does not work...and I wonder what is so fun about it...or is it that I am just plain boring....

2. long days aren't that...if you choose the right combination and have the right timetable...LO.....like me...

3. "fly an aeroplane" I take offence to that phrase....because flying with YFC isn't an all take easy and enjoyable task....and I am a guo lai ren...btw, if you are taking YFC as a second CCA.......make sure your first one is so slack....in fact I think YFC is quite heavy.....hiazz.....

my heel is hurting beyond measure...i am very worried....I think I should go get a referral letter soon....lots of stuff to finish tonight......BYE.....

today is the first day of training....it was not very tiring....trained with THE SHEN....as in THE SHEN.....hiazz...amazingly super duper ultra very extremely ZAI...woah...I am lacking in superlatives to describe SHENESS.....ARGHH..too pro...

oh and I think this is old news...but my batch is super duper ultra very extremely screw up...so screwed up that the coach loses interest and the seniors step in to get fresh blood and try depose of the captain...in short...i think the batch is screwed and they screwed me up and I am damn pissed....as I said...."j2 liao, no time, quick teach me!" and all he did was just laugh and whacked me up.....and even my CT keeps on putting me down....I AM SICK OF IT............YOU ALL JUST WATCH ALL.......DIE DIE DIE......LOL.........woah...I can feel the passion.....all over again....come on I CAN DO IT......YEAHHHHHHH DIE

and I forgot my heel cups....so I am hurting like crazy.....

and I swored quite a bit....because...oh well....

oh and the school is a very unsafe place to have things lying about....to think that the students of the permier school in Singapore are nothing but a bunch of money-hungry, no integrity, useless bunch of creeps.....I HATE THIEVES...

have a lot of work on mind right now....and YF that gay is insisting that I write something that I don't not wish too...DISGUSTING....I really need a diary....

hiaz thats all for today...I am feeling extremely weird today man....GAYNESS.....training tomorrow...and my heel is gone...I am really an injury prone person...shall go plan what to do for the rest of the night...

'Newcastle are a big side. It should be a great football match as they are both attacking sides.' -Ian Rush

What is important in the above statement is both...which means Liverpool and Newcastle....But Liverpool don't usually go with the phrase attacking side...do they? correct me if I am wrong....LOL

drawing flak from all directions I see...but who cares?

shall go read the alkenes notes and laundry man......bye

i wonder when blogger will be fine?

and for the umpteen time, i need a dairy...ARGH...

things havent been going exactly my way recently and that make me wonder if pork had struck gold when he said that it will be terrible when your luck runs out...thanks for the curse man!

feelinga bit tired now...due to the late nights...tomorrow training starts...hiaz...how sian....i will only go on tuesday wenesday friday and saturday.....that is all the time i have...but i doubt it will satisfy the coach...in for screwing...AGAIN...

and yf's webpage...is terribly disgusting...LOL...and i am starting to hate PE already..so much for for PE being fun...it is totally terrible since the teacher I have is moronic and thinks the world of himself...he also was a twisted idea that PE is more an exercise of him talking and we listening...than we playing and him watching....GAY

i would like to make a trip to POPULAR bookstore soon to pick up some stuff and to the school library to get some nice VCDs....

one more resolution...
I will not waste time on unnecessary things

and now even Christmas Fun is breathing down my neck for evaluations, peer appraisal and what not...hiaz...it seems, if i am not mistaken...my timetable is also needed....OMG....i hope ziming replies soon and bail me out of this mess....

STUFF TO DO IN ORDER....

shower
read up on biology
read up and do some chemistry
read up on physics/maths...depending on what undone hw i have left....

and i still have 4 very important things on my calender....but since they are important but not urgent...i shall try to curb my nervous tendencies.....

thats it..finish the crap and rest...long sad day ahead.......gig leung's "turn left, turn right" song can kick in now.....

i have decided to become a tutor...and have decided to forgo defending my noble ideals of community work...but hey....good things come at a price...

this reminds me that I have to do 40 plus hours of CIP to meet the quota...and I have this brilliant business idea...to initiate a tutoring CIP and then give the students and option to extend their tutoring sessions at a tiny price...good yeah!

oh gosh...i sound so mercenary....

in view of possible PT during tomorrow's PE session, I think I will jsut do some pp tonight...trying to hit 13 later...

CNY is my favourite festival and I have to go the the nightmarket at chinatown...It absolutely looking fun and seems buzzing with activity....really need to go soak in the abundance of festive spirit there..I read that the market is 3km long with 200 000 stalls..wahhh....in yf's words...DELICIOUS....

I hope to be an owner of a digital camera then...so that i can take photos...BUT...what about the theives....hiazz...

the world is unsafe....

Home Improvement...

Today has been rather nice....I woke up really late at 10am plus...and went about doing the alkenes tutorial which is due tomorrow...pity that i dont have the notes with me thanks to laziness towards the end of last year.....

afternoon was spend on lunch, ace combat 04 and reading....then i decided to try my luck at connecting the scanner. I wanted to connect the parallel port from the mboard to the scanner and the printer to the scanner. I knew that the printer port of the scanner was cocked up, but yeah, I was feeling lucky so...i went ahead....asking for trouble....obviously things dont repair by themselves and that includes spoilt scanners...in the end I spent 2 or 3 hours meddling with wiring, cables banging my head under the table and now....back to sqaure one....LOL...i am really crazy....but now that both the printer and scanner are tucked under the table inside cupboards and can be hooked up in less than 10secs when required...i feel an ultimate sense of satisfication...just that i have to go test if they work....

oh and i must figure out why the printer port doesnt work.....

things to do for the rest of the day :

1. do weights or some form of exercise
2. pack bag
3. do physcis
4. do chem
5. do bio
6. slack

sch starts again tomorrow....wat is the MOE's problem....

i am still waiting for a diary...i need it badly....

i still cant get pass mission 10 of ace combat 04...hiazz

just out of sudden impulse, i shall do an inventory on all my PS2 games...

ACE COMBAT 04 SHATTERED SKIES.....halfway through
DARK CLOUD 2.....left the last bit
DYNASTY WARRIORS 4.....finished with my brother
WINNING ELEVEN FINAL EVOLUTION.....training
FINAL FANTASY X INTERNATIONAL.....havent started
FINAL FANTASY X-2.....havent started
METAL GEAR SOLID 2 SONS OF LIBERTY....finished once
MOBILE SUIT GUNDAM: ENCOUNTERS IN SPACE.....havent started
SUIKODEN III.....havent started
THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE TWO TOWERS.....dont like it
XENOSAGA EPISODE 1: DER WILLE ZUR MACHT.....halfway through
ZONE OF THE ENDERS: THE 2ND RUNNER.....finished

that is $120 worth of games...and the PS2 would be obsolete in about 2 years time...darn.....so i hope to finish as many games as possible...i wouldnt say it is a new year resolution to finish the games because it is more of an interest and not top priority at this point of time, but yes, i want to complete of this marvellous piece of works..especially the final fantasies.....wish me luck!

The day of all days...

i dont normally give titles to my post...but i will just fit one in here because it has once again strengthen my resolve....

today..was what i thought to be a slack day...a slow day..but it turned out far from that...i left house at about 5 pm for a jog to the chinese garden since i have never been there...greeting me right at the entrance was NO CYCLING NO FISHING NO SKATING...and a whole lists of other NOs....i can hardly believe the stupidity of the park authorities of singapore....no wonder no one visits the chinese gardens....except for a few conned tourist i saw during jogging...who were PAYING to get into some scam exhibit....the place was largely restricted because of the on going renovations being carried out...not much of a good impression...would rather jog at the stadium...but i really dun like running man...and i tink my fitness needs a boost..felt so sluggish with people zooming by me.....LOL...after 20 mins of jogging....i climbed up the pagoda...which i tink is about 7 stories...just when i got up there...this middle age chinese man..who i presume was taking photos because of his camera equipment he had on him came down..he was humming/whistling/making a weird eerie noise/sound or whatever...and he rab down the stairs all the way with his voice floating up to me....mixed with the sound of his running, the howling of the wind and the chinese music drifting in...i was quite freaked out...i thought the place was surely haunted or that that guy might be some psychopath...after a brief rest and taking in the scenery, i headed for home...

on the way, under the mrt tracks, i meet a family trying to take a family photo....there were 3 generations...and they were all lined up with the chinese garden as the backdrop, the kids jumping and bouncing about, and the father (second generation) fussing over the camera, trying to get the timer thingy to work, then rushing over to join his family before the flash went and the photo taken...a typical scene from those heart warming channel 8 chinese drama serials...never thought it would exist for me to witness...

when i got home, i was dead tired...but the new bicycle came....i wasnt in the best state of mind because i pushed myself during the jog...run...haha..instead of $120, i was counting out $170 for the delievery man...but he pointed out my mistake..i thought he could have easily pocketed the extra money...anyway thank god that did not happen...he mentioned to me to remember to take the keys of the lock and gave them to me as i came out of the house after returning the extra 50 dollars to the wallet...after he left i started tearing out the cardboard and pastic wrappers on the bike..and proceeded to dump them in the bin...the key to the lock..went down the bin as well.....that was how careless and fatigued i was....

of course, i didnt know that the key went down..but after a 10 min fantic search, with tensions rising....i came to that answer....i was in a blur and pissed off with myself....i dont how i got the idea..it was a lethal combination of rage anger determination and hatred...but i decieded that i will go down to the rubbish chute to look for the key....this is the second time i did something like this...the first was at Pasir Ris...

the first time i did was to rush down stairs but i found that there were 6 refusal chambers all secured by padlocks...so i rushed up to get my bike and decided to head for the management office of the estate...after hunting our the address of the office (under blk 122) i rushed over just to find it closed...dissed i was..but not giving up....i went to approach the security gaurd nearest my block and explained to him my situation...and he give me the key to the refuse chambers! #1 interesting fact it seems all 6 of them are locked by 6 locks that can be opened by just 1 key...

initially i thought that since my house number is #22-145...i might be able to strike it lucky at refuse chamber 5..so i tried the lock...but no....it would open! the key could slide in easily but it cannot turn...after about 10 mins of trying i discovered the way of opening the lock...#2 interesting fact it seems you have to push down the U shaped silver part of the lock and slide in the key and turn at the same time..but the key cannot be slided in all the way....it various from 1 lock to the other and u just have to slide it out slowly maintaining a torque on the key at all times before the spring of the lock jumps.....so i opened refuse chamber 2 3 4 5...i tried to look for telltale signs like the cardboards...but i couldnt find any of them...then i had logical deduction which turned out to be correct #3 interesting fact there are 6 units on each floor and thus the 6 refuse chambers will each serve each unit and the number starts from the life A all the way to C....so my unit was served by refuse chamber 3...opening it, i still could not find any cardboard or any signs to show that there isa remote chance that i might find the key....so i had an idea and rushed back home again...i took out today's papers Jan 3 and used a marker to tag the paper and threw it down.....back i went to chamber 3.....but no paper.....! i realised that it must have been caught somewhere along its way down....so the keys.....OH NO....after so long of searching the chambers 2 3 4 5......am i to fail?

#4 boring fact refuse chambers......are so darn dirty...they are as filthy as...i dont know how to describe them....disgusting..poor cleaners

as i scanned the rubbish container in the chamber, thinking how good it would be to find the key and how pissed i would be if i cannot find it.....i suddenly caught sight of it......the pair of keys held by a metal ring was sitting so pretty on top of a piece of cardboard that was horizontally over much of the rubbish near the top....i dont not know if it was there the first time....or if there i i missed it....but this is really a stroke of luck and fate......lady luck simply loves me......i gather....so i took the keys....and threw away the plastic bags i was using as gloves and raced back up...i was 90% sure that i have netted the keys but was really fearing the what ifs....to be sure i tried them and they worked!!! PHEW

and later the shower and all which i am too tired to write...i hope i dont catch and disease and die or something....

but what i really want to say is what drove me to such lengths to find a pair of keys to a $10....i am not very sure...but i knew some of it is rage...and i was very determined to find the keys no matter what and despite attempts from my parents to stop me......i ignored them all the way....maybe there really is a God out there......to look out for people who really want something and get into action to inch their towards their goals....i think i have found that God...He rewards everyone who tries and wants it so badly..those with the strongest desire and the most fiery passion...regardless of race or age or sex or even goals....like so many other Gods do....and that God is in yours in my heart...just waiting for you to call Him....

such a power should be harnessed by everyone for everything they do...dont let it go to waste...the human spirit triumphs all adversites.....

i intend to use such a power...you should too....

Der Wille zur Macht

currently immensing myself in the world of jack shepherd.....the laundry man is a bk written by jack needham who i had previously came across only once on a newspaper article......for being henpecked...LOL....

anyway found this really gd....."There was always somebody who already knew what you needed to know, and if you asked him nicely, well...maybe he'd tell you"

but sometimes the real treasures are in the searching not in the knowing....

today is a slow slacky day....i might go jogging later...and do some weights at night...(so that i can go explore the chinese garden and listen to xian ge ji yi..multi tasking at its best..LOL)....since it is one, or is that two, of my new resolutions..which reminds me that i have to get a diary soon to write them all down..dang...

i hav realised that if my room door is at an angle of abt 25 degrees, the signal strength of the LAN actually increases...i really wonder why..hmm interesting...

have been come online incessantly...just like the beginning of last year....and training is starting on Jan 6...there goes my life...hiazz...quite sick of seeing the fencing people day in day out....but...i tink i will enjoy it....LOL....

did some work today....like a few question on physics and biology...there is still so much undone homework...and monday is tutorial day...so screw it...

nothing much going on today yeah.....boring....i wonder what are the others doing now...

you are the chicken of my chicken rice says:
she doesn't even deserve to be the plate of my chicken rice

i'm the duck of ur chicken rice...no...i am just a duck says:
can i be ur cuCUMbers?

i'm the duck of ur chicken rice...no...i am just a duck says:
LOLLLLL

you are the chicken of my chicken rice says:
erps you? u will like it more if u be the table under the plate of chicken rice

this is the sort of conversations i have....i am really moronic....hiazz....

i am blogging too much...i am bored and not motivated to do work....tt why i am blogging too much...haha....sad right? Right.

btw...today i met 2 very polite pple...that slightly improved my view of singaporean.....wat if they are not singaporeans?

1. a driver i met on the way home today...
2. the extremely helpful customer service personnal...even tho it is his/her job....

n starhub's network coverage is terrible.....but since it is cheap..hiazzz.....

Dang........I JUST THOUGHT OF PLAYING WITH THE NEW ESC KEY........and i deleted all that i have just typed......GAY...btw yf! it is too small......

as i was saying.......i was late for school today.....because 1. i didnt run for the train at jurong eat interchange and 2. i didnt run to school form bouna vista.....school was really quite slack today...a little work but nothing too taxing.....GP homework do not have to be done HAHAHAHA....at least tt is wat i think...ken toh da dragon ball is the new CT rep.....he volunteered himself AND his wife....so that they can work hand in hand......LOL...no actually lck helped him......HAHA.....i hope loke doesnt make me go first for presentation......or i will kill him....the new J1s are here...and omg....there are so many RI kids around....I mean A LOT....definitely more than my batch....shall go PWing someday...haha...

currently listening to sammi cheng's new CD..it isnt very nice.....but she is darn pretty...

my room is very dark now cos if i draw the curtains back, the sun will be too glary..a man came to add something to the windows just now so that they will close snuggly and eliminate more noise from the nearby Jurong Town Hall Road...and he climbed out onto the ledge to do it!!!! OMG...tt was very very scary.....feared for his life man....the ledge can fit a man sitting down, but my house is 22 floors up...and he just climbed out like tt....woah.....

i called miw.com.sg to ask why i havent received my password...the word mail....according to them means post.....omg....just look at how technology has advanced...i was expecting email! so i have got them to send like 10 letters because i kept on requesting for my password? omg....they are really very careful arent they.....haha...but i think it is a waste of time and money.....it takes about 3 working days...maybe i can suggest to them an equally secure but more cost and time efficient method and win some much needed cash.....haha.shall wiat patiently for my password anf get my dad to collect it...

the wireless access router is extremely sensitive...a 1cm shift in its position can cause a 20% change in the signal strength...i have to go make its spot soon b4 someone messes it up again....

i have decided to put away the idea of a storage box for stationary cos i dun tink it is a very necessary thing to have....i chucked everything into this haversack and placed it in my cupboard...btw...either my spelling'english totally suck or i am dyslexic..i am inclined to think tt i am the latter...lol.....shall try to get some stuff down today....feeling rather sleepy now....hiazz....gonna rain soon

ouch...my right knee is acting up...as i bend it, i can feel strain and numbness in the ligaments....

1. pack file
2. do alkene tutorial....how to do without notes?!?!?!?!.damn gay
3...etc etc etc.....cant remember.....

i need a diary ASAP.....trng starts on 6 Jan omg omg omg.....i saw mark at rj today...is he pereira's students? oh gosh.....

just finished watching the japanese serial on channel 8...let me just write one last time before school starts.....

...i can see the moon again....it is going to be 3/4 soon....hung in the night sky far higher than last nite....there is a chinese restaurant in the chinese garden....or at least thats wat i tink cos i hav never been to the chinese garden b4...n i love to look at it through the binoculars....love to just see people going about their lives.....wondering how are thye different from mi...cos the onli life i have known...for the past 17 yrs...would be my own....n i think that goes for everyone too....

...as promised, i will do a food exculsive on the dishes served at yf's party...
first must be the chicken pies....they are very very good..the aroma just hits so and i think the standard is at least that of Cotaage Pie situated at White Sands shopping centre....and trust mi...Cottage Pie make a lot of money...the pies have a nice crust which is not to flaky...so tt it is easy to eat and the fillings of peas meat and corn is done to prefection...

...there is also the imported beer...which accordin gto yf would cost a great deal..personally i am not a great fan of alcohol...but the beer doesnt taste anything special.....i heard from seniors frosters beer is very good...anyway tt beer had a aftertaste that was salty??!?!? i sweared it tasted like soy sauce....

...the kit kat which was imported from UK...this is a tough one....i am not sure whether it is pyschological or wat....but the chocolate does taste richer and fuller den the usual one. it also looked darker...we were also served some sweets which have a chocolate covering and some malt? or something similiar to it inside the covering that gave that sweet a crunch feel...imagine welters? (not sure of the spelling) butter sweets coated wif chocolate...

...the hokkien noodles were great to say the least because i like my noodles fried wetter instead of those really dry ones which just is pain difficult to eat...the balachan chill was gd very the noodles and the tinge of lime just added to the taste making it more sensual...i had many helping of the noodles and was tyring to get everyone to go for a second round during the bridge games so tt good food wouldnt go to waste...

AND THOSE CHICKEN WINGS.........first thing is the wings lack the drumlet so it only has two portions..and the bone of the mid section has been skillfully removed! even tho i tried to look for where the incision to debone the chicken occurred..i couldnt find it....this has to be the best chicken eating experience every in terms of ease and cleanliness..the wings came in 2 flavours both of which i equally liked althought the light brown variety was a tad to salty for me...but the experience of eating chicken wings with a fork overwhelm me.....

there were also fish fillets....i took one of them....and i have to say that the fish was very tender! the batter just melted away so that i fel the texture of the fish...the thickness of the batter was done to perfection!

other dishes which featured included the carrot cake which looked and tasted like those made by my grandmother, and tao suan with fried dough fritters otherwise known as youtiao.....unfortunately i did not get to taste that.....

i might not be a food critic...but i do know good food when i eat them.....trust me...

on to more mundane matters.....tomolo will be sian cos there is sch...but i am hopping to get a few things in order....

1. fencing matters for 2004
2. a storage box for stationary
3. repair the front tyre of my bike
4. send the house warming video which yf did to everyone..
5. write down my resolutions...

recently......i have been rather close to yf...

will history repeat itself....i wonder sometimes......

gonna watch the house warming video again before i sleep

i really want to get a digicam or camcorder.....will do some research on tt.....i need to document my life a bit more.....they say pple who run away from the present dwell in the past..i tink without a past, there wouldnt be a present...everything one does...definitely has a reason.....and the reason has to be the past....